Kreyling Korner – Week#2 – 04/28/16
THE LIPSMACKER MATCH OF THE WEEK
Welcome back fools! My bad about last week. Work sucks sometimes – unless you have Cletus’ job. Since the first week of the 2016 GCCGL season, Allen has done the following:
1.) Walked around the halls, talking to people about the golf league
2.) Infiltrated Tucker’s unlocked computer and sent fake emails about the golf league
3.) Walked around some more, convincing GCCGLers to vote for me in this week’s poll
Well the old man’s shenanigans proved to work again – this week you guys are stuck with Kreyling versus the league.
Let’s get to the first MOW for 2016 and see if this MOW jinx is still a thing in 2016.
A/B Group – Brian (Needs a Nickname) Turnwald versus Pete “Goldie” Goldenberg. I like this match-up for a couple reasons. First, Brian’s new so we haven’t seen this match-up before (and it’s hard writing about the same groups over and over). Second, Pete was voted luckiest player in the GCCGL, an award I’m in total agreement with. Glossy prediction: Pete wins on the Willows 18th hole in some whacky situation that would only happen to him. Like…he slices the ball straight towards the fence guarding the driving range…99 out of 100 people would miss the fence and the ball would sail out of bounds. Pete, on the other hand, gets a kick off the fence and the ball rolls to about 3 feet from the cup.
C/D Group – John “Syndrome” Rayburn vs. Oliver “Ollie” Livermore. Let’s face it – Rayburn is probably the most mentally intimidating opponent in the GCCGL. Many a man have set out on Thursday night for a leisurely 9 holes with Syndrome, those same men have stood on the 9th hole in tears. Ironically, Rayburn’s Jedi mind tricks haven’t broken Livermore (Ollie leads the career match-up 3-1). Ollie is fresh off a climb up Mount Everest (or some mountain equivalent), so I think he is tired. Glossy Prediction – Syndrome wins 6-4.
THE KREYLING KORNER
Let’s keep this party polite….Never get out of my sight…Stick with me baby, I’m the guy that you came in with…Luck be a lady tonight.
If I need to tell you the name of the man pictured above, you need to get out from the rock you live under and buy the album “Classic Sinatra – His Greatest Performances 1953 – 1960.” This, of course, is a greatest hits album of Mr. Frank Sinatra. Take this advice from LipGloss: on a nice warm evening – sit outside, light a cigar, pour a bourbon and pop on that album. You will thank me for it.
The line up top is from Mr. Blue Eyes’ famous song “Luck Be a Lady.” Fitting of course since this week’s polling question was – who is the luckiest GCCGL member? I without a doubt voted for both Goldenberg (winner) and Roller (tied for second), so those results make sense to me. However, I’m a little shocked at some of the other people that received votes. Mitch Smith received 2 votes and his career winning percentage is 38%. Rayburn received one vote, but he has the highest handicap in the league. If both these guys really were lucky, wouldn’t they win more and/or have a lower handicap?
Now, as I stated earlier, I agree with Roller and Goldenberg being lucky, and I don’t fault them for it. Both are generally good dudes and deserve the good fortune that comes their way. But Cletus is lucky? He was tied for second place which means a lot of the people in this league have witnessed his luck. How does this fool have good fortune? He’s diabolical, he’s rude, he’s loud, he’s sort of funny looking…and that’s on a good day. How in the hell is he rewarded with good luck? The world can be a cruel cruel place.
Until next week – fairways and greens my friends.
