Kreyling Korner – Week #8 – 06/09/16

THE LIPSMACKER MATCH OF THE WEEK

Two losses last week brings my overall record to 3-6-1. I feel like my MOW record is sinking quicker than Gambler’s Fallacy’s chances of finishing in the money.  Let’s see if I can right the ship (pun intended) this week.

A/B Group – Mike “Radio” Tucker vs. Mitch “Prince Albert” Smith – This one is going to be a doozy! I hate to admit this, but Tucker is having a pretty good season.  His record is 3-2 and has a cumulative point total of 27.5, which averages to 5.5 points per match.  Mitch on the other hand is 1-3-1.  That alone would make you think he is having a terrible season, but he has a total of 25 points, which equals an average of 5 points a match.  It’s really amazing how well Mitch is playing, but receiving none of the benefits of winning.  The Prince has to give Radio a whopping 7 strokes tonight and I don’t care who you are, that’s a ton of strokes to overcome.  Glossy Prediction:  Mitch wins 5.5 – 4.5.  I know I just said Mitch has to give Radio a ton of strokes, but I don’t care…I’m not picking Tucker.

C/D Group – Jason “Cupcake” Nill vs. Joe “Boot Boy” Eiser – I’m picking this match because it took Joe about 30 seconds to start complaining about the strokes he had to give Jason post cupcake’s “2016 Week#8 Lineup / Head to Head” email.  I believe Joe’s exact quote was – “my back started hurting when I saw that…ugh.”  His comment “I saw that” is obviously reference to the 2 strokes will be receiving in tonight’s match.  You would think by now Joe would realize that he will be giving everyone in the C/D group strokes this year.  Obviously this is a sharp contrast from playing in the A/B group last year where he was receiving strokes on a weekly basis.  Glossy Prediction:   Joe’s comments were in jest, but are the strokes given up really in Boot Boy’s head?  As Jack Nicklaus used to say about a competitor complaining “There’s another one I don’t have to worry about.”  Cupcake wins 6-4.

THE KREYLING KORNER

The week #8 survey asked GCCGL members for 2 pieces of information: 1.) what GCCGL members used to watch on their VCRs, and 2.) nicknames for members of the league who don’t have one, and any potential new nicknames for old members.

Honestly, it was a little nervous when Jason asked what GCCGL members had in their VCRs. Responses had the potential to be a little on the “dirty” side.   For the most part, the responses were both PG-13 and entertaining.  Below are the best responses:

George Almeida – Jane Fonda workout video.

Troy Bachmann – Harry and the Hendersons

Allen Bloomhuff – Deliverance (romantic comedy for Cletus)

Seth Brooks – Preschool potty training videos

Joe Carrier – Billy Buckner 1986 World Series Game 6 play

Joe Cook – Lee Trevino Golf Instructional Videos

Nick Duer – One Tree Hill, River Monsters and Jersey Shore

Joe Eiser – Richard Simmons – Sweatin’ to the Oldies

Pete Goldenberg – Fiddler on the Roof

Mike Harris – David Allen Coe’s MTV Special

Kurt Kreyling – The original hair club for men video

Oliver Livermore – Facts of Life and Golden Girls

Mike Morell – Dexter

Jason Nill – Fast and Furious

Ed Petryk – Saved by the Bell – The College Years

John Rayburn – Blazzing Saddles (editor’s note – there were 9 responses for JR…I could only use 3)

Brian Roddy – Whatever his wife wanted to tape

Danny Roller – Air Bud

John Schemmel – Weekend at Bernie’s

Adam Schott – Clarissa Explains it All and Dawson’s Creek

Justin Seiter – My Little Pony (seasons 2 – 8)

Mitch Smith – P90X…stolen from Cletus

Mike Tucker – Dirty Dancing

Brian Turnwald – Martha Stewart Living

On to the nicknames…I kind of feel like Bluto (played by John Belushi) in Animal house when he gives the new pledges there fraternity names. You remember the scene… “Dorfman, I’ve thought long and hard about this.  Your Delta Tau Chi name is – Flounder.”  Anyway, the league has spoken…and the three individuals below will forever be known in the GCCGL as the following:

Mike Morell – Meat

Adam Schott – Marge

Brian Roddy – The Senator

We also had several responses for new nicknames of existing members. I don’t know how everyone else feels, but I think it’s kind of hard to change nicknames of the existing members because they are so ingrained into the GCCGL’s bloodline.  Regardless, here are some that I thought were actually pretty funny:

Allen Bloomhuff – Crippled

Seth Brooks – Co-op

Joe Carrier – Angry Lobster (this still makes me laugh)

Joe Eiser – Little Richard

Jason Nill – Chicken

Until next week – fairways and greens my friends.