KREYLING KORNER – WEEK #5 – 05-21-15

THE LIPSMACKER MATCH OF THE WEEK

It’s fair to say that Dr. Lipgloss’ MOW picks have been less than stellar this year – my current record is 0-3.  Have I been going too much on “gut” instinct versus historical results?  Maybe so…  This week we have a handful of match-ups with significant history.  But I think two are worth mentioning.

Oliver “Ollie” Livermore takes on Melissa “the Golf Angel” Cember.  These two have squared off 5 times, and Ollie holds a slight advantage at 3-2.  I know I said that maybe I’ve been relying too much on my “gut” instinct, but the Golf Angel came to play this year.  A renewed focus on golf in 2015  and a brand new set of clubs are proving hard to beat.  She is 2-1 in the 2015 campaign and is averaging 6 points a match.  Even though Ollie is on my team – I have to pick the Golf Angle tonight 6-4.

The MOW for week #5 goes to the seasoned vets – Mike “Big Donkey” Harris versus Pete “Goldie” Goldenberg.  When two heavy hitters like this go toe to toe, it’s hard to ignore.  Pete holds the advantage in this series 8-4-2.  The Glossy One is going against his gut instinct on this pick (I might as well try it once…right?) and I’m taking Goldie – 5.5 to 4.5.  At this point in 2015 – I think Mike is playing better golf.  But, if history is the best predictor of the future, Pete will pull this one out.

As a side note to all of this – there are whispers around the league of a MOW jinx similar to that of the Sports Illustrated cover jinx.  Something to keep an eye on…

THE KREYLING KORNER

Friends of the GCCGL – we are in desperate need of some fashion tips.  So far this year we have had Cletus in jeans, Almeida wearing a dickey (which Cousin Eddie is proudly displaying in the picture above), cargo shorts, questionable sock choices, the drop in white belts…ugh, I’m giving myself a headache.

This week we are going to talk about a fashion conundrum.  Fashion conundrum – what are you talking about LG?  It’s simple really – you have an article of clothing you know looks hideous, but it has a fashionable label on it.  So – what do you do?  Your eyes tell you even the Portuguese Warrior wouldn’t wear it, but your head tells you everything is ok because it’s got a fancy alligator label on it.  You, my friend, have a fashion conundrum.

Case in point – last week, Mitch Smith wore navy blue, knee high (basically) socks that completely contrasted with his outfit.  His justification for wearing said socks – they had the Ralph Lauren logo on them.  First and foremost – refresh your memory on the appropriate sock length for age here.   Mitch – you are one of the youngest guys in the league – you can never wear anything other than “no-show” socks.  Period, end of story…thanks for playing.

Then we have Cupcake.  Listen, I tend to lay off Cupcake when it comes to fashion because he is disabled.  The poor guy is color blind – so making fun of him for what he wears is kind of like making fun of Tucker for drinking protein shakes after a round…it’s almost too easy.  Regardless, I can’t let this one go today.  Below is the shirt Jason actually plans on wearing tonight for golf.

Yes – it does have the Greg Norman “shark” on the sleeve.   But, Greg Norman hasn’t been relevant in a major championship since 1999…which I’m pretty sure was the same year that shirt was made.

Listen, the bottom line is this: when facing a fashion conundrum, remind yourself – just because it has a fancy label doesn’t mean it’s cool.

Until next week – fairways and greens my friends.