Kreyling Korner – Week #14 – 07-24-14

THE LIPSMACKER MATCH OF THE WEEK

I really should make Roller and Harris the MOW, but that already happened this year. I’ll repeat the stats again because it’s kind of shocking. These two have matched up 15 times and Roller simply owns Harris at 10-4-1. Nothing against Danny, he is one of the top players in the league. It’s just hard to believe Harris has a losing record to anyone…especially one that lopsided.

If not Roller and Harris…then who? For the first time this year, I’m throwing myself in the mix. Tonight El Capitán Glossy (that’s my Spanish nick name) takes on “Cousin” Joe Cook. We have only played each other once in the last three years. And that match came to the last hole.  Joe pared and I bogeyed to lose 5.5 to 4.5.

This year we were supposed to play the first match of the season. But Joe had a hangnail or something and didn’t show up. The result – I had to play Zack McNeil, who I tied gross, but lost to overall because I had to give up a stroke. Oh you know what is even better, there was only one score in the entire league that night that beat Zack and I. Does it still sound like I’m bitter? Good, because I am.

I’m not going call a winner or a point total because I don’t want to jinx myself. My prediction is simply this – a blood bath!

THE KREYLING KORNER

After last week’s round (you know…the one where NO ONE in the early groups bought beer), a group of us were discussing current issues, economics and world hunger when the topic turned to an annoyance of Big Donkey’s. Mike stated he hates it when a playing partner gives him a compliment after a mediocre shot. For example, a drive that ends up in the rough. His partner may say great shot simply because Mike hit it far…but Mike’s point is this. If it was a great shot – it would have ended up in the fairway.

Now, Mike is a very bitter person, but I agree with him on this point. It got me thinking – what are some of the most annoying sayings in golf. Here are my top 5 – feel free to add any I may have missed in the comments section.

“Trees are 90% air.”

No they are not. I don’t care what stupid scientist analyzed the molecular structure of the leaves, bark….or whatever. If a tree is in your way, and you actually try to hit through it because you think it’s 90% air…it will not end well for you. Now that I think about it, you probably deserve the poor result because you think trees are 90% air!!!

“If you hit it, it’s in.”

You know…it never occurred to me I should have hit my putt harder. I never actually wanted to make the putt…I really wanted to leave it a foot short. Thanks Captain Obvious.

“Keep it in the short stuff.”

Oh really? You mean aiming for the trees / water / sand / rough in general is a bad idea? Here’s your sign.

“I hit the ball great, I just didn’t score well.”

I have to admit, I’m guilty of using this one. That being said, I still think it’s stupid. Really – if you hit the ball great, why isn’t your score lower? Putting counts too and if you 3-jack every green…well you didn’t really hit the ball well…did you?

“Better lucky than good.”

Hmmmm…..nope I’d rather be good. Ok – so I was fortunate my ball hit off the tree into the middle of the fairway. But if I was good I wouldn’t have hit it that far into the woods to begin with!