Kreyling Korner – Week #11 – 06/30/16

THE LIPSMACKER MATCH OF THE WEEK

Two losses in US Open week takes my overall MOW record to 4-9-1. The chances of me maintain a 2016 overall record .500 is dropping faster than a fat kid chasing an ice cream truck.  On to week 11!

A/B Group – Adam “Marge Schott” vs. Mitch “Prince Albert” Smith. I think the GCCGL knew this MOW was set back in Week #4.  For those that forgot, here is the email exchange:

PRINCE ALBERT: I’d beat you and Tucker left-handed if you two were playing a scramble. Adam — I hope you don’t mistake this for me being the one doing “a lot of talking”.

MARGE: Listen here RANDALL, I don’t care who starts it, when you make these outlandish remarks as come backs, you open yourself up for ridicule. Left handed? You should start with winning a head to head match. Let me guess, “You lost to Tucker” will be your comeback, your right I did, I’m embarrassed by it, but I don’t walk around General Cable like the 2^nd coming of Tiger Woods. I’m sure you would like to be cowboys from Arizona or pimps from Oakland but it’s not Halloween. Grow up; Peter Pan, Count Chocula.

This still makes me laugh. Up until this point, I think most of the league thought Adam was a somewhat quiet, laid-back guy.  Out of nowhere – Marge drops a Macho Man Randy Savage Flying Elbow Drop from the top rope.  I’ve been in the league for 5 years…and this still is the best trash talk I’ve heard.  GLOSSY PREDICTION: Just because I love Adam’s email so much, I’m going with the underdog tonight.  Adam wins in a tight one 5.5 – 4.5.

A/B Group – Mike “Big Donkey” Harris vs. Joe “Cousin Joe” Cook. But Lipgloss, what about the C/D group MOW? Listen – there are 6 subs tonight and 2 members that agreed to a split.  Out of those 8 people, 7 of them are from the C/D Group.  There are better match-ups in the A/B groups so deal with it…

Now where were we – oh, the Family Feud – this is a match-up I look forward to each year. Cupcake is out this week, so I have no idea where the overall match-up stands.  But if my memory serves me correctly, I’m pretty sure Mike holds a significant edge.  What I find interesting this year – Joe is getting four strokes.  Again, our statistician is off this week, but I would believe this is the largest stroke differential in the history of the match-up.  Joe’s hungry for a win (and complaining about a conspiracy theory that I never put him and his cousin in the same group.  Well here is an idea butt munch…you and your cousin should request preferred tee-times closer together.  Joe wants 5:16; Mike wants 5:56….you can never make people happy), and the friendly confines of the Pioneer front 9 have to be an advantage for CJ.  Mike is the best golfer in the league.  GLOSSY PREDICTION: It’s hard to pick against the Big Donkey…and for that reason I will not.  Mike wins tonight 6-4.

THE KREYLING KORNER

Seriously – 7 responses to this week’s survey question. 7 Responses!  Let that sink in for a little bit GCCGL.  We are better than that.  Let’s chalk up the low response rate to the summer vacation schedule and the 4^th of July holiday next week.  I have full confidence the league will respond better in week 12 (at least I hope).

This week Captain Cupcake asked what unknown/special talent each GCCGL members have. Below are the best responses:

George Almeida – Hola Hoop Champ

Troy Bachmann – He’s an incredible actor…played the bear in the Revenant to perfection.

Allen Bloomhuff – Wheelchair Olympian

Seth Brooks – Looking for a co-op position with General Cable again.

Joe Carrier – Is a closet Yankee fan.

Joe Cook – Was aiming at Tucker the whole time.

Nick Duer – Is the president of the Bill Belichick fan club.

Mike Harris – In a 12 year secret bromance with Ollie.

Kurt Kreyling – Absorbs all blame that Nill sheds off and makes it a joke.

Jason Nill – Lifelong ambition to open Cupcake’s Cupcakes after his GCC career.

John Rayburn – Badminton

John Schemmel – Tinder expert

Justin Seiter – Petitioned to have his first name legally changed to Dickens.

Mike Tucker – Anyone want to buy a Volkey wedge?

 
A couple other things to point out in this week’s Kreyling Korner.   First, George was voted the co-commissioner most people would miss while on vacation.  No surprises there, but I ask this question.  What does George suddenly have to do each Thursday night now that he is recovering from hernia surgery?  He comes out one night, rides around in a cart, and openly admits he has a blast.  Since then, completely absent.  I get he can’t play golf, but you can’t convince me he now has more “important” things to do on Thursday nights.  His kids are older – they don’t want to hang out with him.  Hang out with the wife – don’t you get enough of that outside of the 20 evenings during the year?  Plus – they have been married for a long time – I’m sure she enjoys the break.

The only other person receiving a vote in this poll was the Glossy One. How you like that Cupcake – you received 0 votes.

Finally, there was another anonymous comment about an option for a weekly skins game. As the co-commissioner’s office has said before – this is a great idea.  The GCCGL members are free to organize and track a skins game on a weekly basis.

Until next week – fairways and greens my friends.