June 14, 2012 Update
[dc]W[/dc]e are just about half way through the season. It was another perfect day for golf. We had 22 of 24 golfers participate. This included four substitutes, Brad Cunningham, Nate Berkley, Paul Eaglin, Mike Hlebovy. Thank you!
This week, on June 20th the first day of Summer, the Summer Solstice takes place, the longest day and shortest night of the year in the Northern Hemisphere. In other words, starting this Thursday on June 21st, we begin losing daylight each and every day. Isn’t that nice? No worries, I think we’ll be OK up until the last couple of weeks of the season.
I heard one of the strangest golf stories this week and of course it happened in the GCCGL. Couzin’ Joe hits his drive on #13, the par 3 over the water into the left bunker. He had an awkward downhill side hill lie just on the lip. He actually had to stand outside the bunker just to be able to take a swing at it. He then blades his bunker shot clean and it hit it about 80 yard towards the #15 green narrowly missing Roller in the process. He mentions that he heard some grumblings and whoever was there, wasn’t too happy about it. Well, as he approaches his ball and gets a better look at it, there seems to be some foreign substance smeared on it. Joe, insists it was chocolate! Chocolate? Really? I suspect that ball was definitely tampered with but it wasn’t with a Hershey bar. My guess would be that someone finally found some good use for goose droppings. It is better than the unthinkable…….yikes! Isn’t there a port-a-potty in that vicinity? When Couzin’ Joe was asked why he thought it was “chocolate”, he said it didn’t smell like the alternative. This quickly brought to mind the great classic movie Caddyshack and the Baby Ruth in the pool scene where a Baby Ruth chocolate bar was thrown into the pool and mistaken for “doodie”. This creates mass chaos amongst the crowded pool inhabitants all the while the Jaws theme is playing in the background. Bill Murray, the grounds keeper, is called upon to clean and disinfect the pool when he sweeps up the suspected “doodie”, smells it and then proceeds to eat the chocolate bar. Seriously, if there is any golfer out there who hasn’t seen this movie, you must go out and rent it.
It’s been long enough now. I think it is time to talk about the elephant in the room. It’s been secretly discussed in back rooms, on the golf course and behind close doors but it is time to bring it out in the open. I’m of course speaking of Syndrome’s team selection abilities. Now, to be fair, Syndrome is very good at what he does. He’s a financial genius and supposedly knows his way around a sailboat and very generous with the post round libations. However when it comes to the strategic in and outs of picking a competitive golf team, well the jury is still out on that one. With 9 weeks left in the season his team, Menace to Sobriety, is 44.75 points out of first place. They are buried deep in the GCCGL basement and it would take nothing short of a miracle to escape it even with half the season left to go. They have yet to win a team match event never mind a scramble. Their team record is 6-19-3 and the Golf Angel has 4 of those wins and she leads the team in points. I’d hate to think where they’d be without the Golf Angel.
Other things that went on included me getting hit in the back right shoulder with another golf ball. This time it wasn’t Donnie Golf Game but David Fausz. We were all on the green on #17 and waiting for David to pitch up from the left front of the green in front of the bunker. Jennifer and myself were off the green towards the back left side and Melissa was on the green lining up her putt. David blades his chip right at me from about 30 – 35 yards. I had a split second to react and in that time I managed to scurry like a rat on a sinking ship behind my bag for protection and turn my back towards the ball. It didn’t hurt. My body is numb to errant golf shots by now. This is the fourth time that I have been struck by a golf ball, if you are keeping count. Some good came out of it. The ball would have most certainly gone several yards beyond the green and struck Eiser who was standing around the tee box on #18. You’re welcome Joe. Instead, the ball careens off my back shoulder and lands softly on the fringe. I think my back hair cushioned the blow and contributed to the soft landing. Despite this lucky break for Fausz, Dominik still won the hole.
We have some funny pictures of Cupcake in trouble and I finally get back at Cletus for snapping pictures of me being violated by a wooden beaver. Below is a video of Cletus in a little predicament. Looks like he got really friendly with the tree. I don’t know why but I couldn’t stop laughing. Turn up the sound, too funny.
The big winners this week were the UMass Debate Team who won their match against the Big Tebowski’s (24 – 16) and have taken over sole possession of first place! They were led by Goldie who took 7.5 points and shot a very respectable 40. NQ8! beat Menace to Sobriety (22.5 – 17.5) and remain in third place. They were led by George Almeida who got lucky and grabbed 6.5 points. Meanwhile the early season favorites, AMDB, have been bumped down to second place 1.25 points behind UMass. They won their match (21 – 19). They were led by Ollie who beat the red hot Cletus and managed 6.5 points. It is still an extremely close race with only 13.75 points between the first 4 teams.
The low net winners were Mike Harris and Joe Eiser (A/B) with low nets of 33 and Oliver Livermore (C/D) with a low net of 32. Congratulations to the winners! We stay on the Pioneer back this week. We hope to see you on the course and as always, hit ’em straight!
George Almeida – GCCGL Co-Commissioner
