2013 – Week 4
Incredibly the weather held up and we actually had a pleasant, if not humid, evening for golf. Despite the threat of thunderstorms, we had another week of perfect attendance thanks to our deep and wonderful list of substitutes. Thanks to Dominik, Remington, Szylakowski and a newcomer Washburn. It seems that our daylight issues are behind us. Believe it or not, we are ¼ through the 2013 season already.
It has been an unusually uneventful season thus far. Not much in the way of controversy or other unusual and interesting happenings throughout the league. I can only fill in so much blog space with nonsense. There were a few talking points. Apparently, although I didn’t know this until this past Thursday, I was winless against Syndrome in several tries. That doesn’t really surprise me. I’ve had to give up many strokes over the years to John all while he buys new equipment and continues to improve his game. However, the drought was ended this past week with a victory. It started off a bit shaky with the both of us hitting terrible drives. Syndrome’s tee shot was lost to the right in the brush while mine was so bad that I had to hit a provisional. My provisional shot was worse than my original tee shot! Luckily I found my tee shot. Needless to say, that first hole was an adventure and delayed things a little for the group behind us. But after that, I thought the speed of play was adequate. We were definitely the reason for the slow start but not the slow finish. We didn’t have anyone pushing us the last three holes.
A disturbing thing happened on the ninth hole as our group was wrapping up. I was away on the green and had a really long putt facing me so Syndrome did the right thing and tended the flag. Syndrome being Syndrome, felt the need to start entertaining the troops who were gathered at the top of the hill. So Johnny starts doing some posing and a little belly dance which was actually funny. With my putt lined up and my address complete, I lift my head to take one last look at the hole before putting and what I saw was utterly unsettling. There was Syndrome, arched back, shirt lifted, showing off his abs which unfortunately for all of us has been buried under 40+ years of fried foods and cheap bear. Needless to say, I had no choice but to step away, shake off that image and regroup. I can’t believe no one took a picture of that despicable display.
Zeke Knechtges wore, in my opinion, a great ensemble this past week which was highlighted by Norwegian flag shorts. Why the Norwegian flag? I can only guess that is where Zeke’s ancestors are from although according to ancestry.com, the name originated from Germany. Apparently the Knechtges’ settled in upper Ohio and Michigan (all 4 families). Again, this is all according to my thorough and detailed research on the Internet…and we all know everything posted on the Internet has to be true. An interest fact about Norway to me was that 70% of the country is inhabitable much like the majority of Covington……..oh come on, I’m just kidding. Believe me, I had a couple of other similes I wanted to use here but the censors wouldn’t let me. All this got me thinking about my surname, Almeida. So I looked it up. First let me correct commissioner Cupcake, the Portuguese meaning of Almeida is not “shank”! I certainly cannot blame anyone for thinking that however. No, the meaning apparently is “plain terrain” or “flat land”. Wow, talk about boring. I was hoping for something with a little more panache. Other interesting antidotes I learned are that my life expectancy is approximately 76 (I’ll be lucky to make it to 56) and I probably should have been a fisherman, a baker or an aglet maker. Aglets are those little plastic ends on shoelaces.
OK, enough of this nonsense. I think we have enough fluff for the blog this week. The big winners this week were Who’s Your Caddie who spanked Tiagra Woods (24 – 16). They were led by The Politician and Bachmann who both grabbed 8 points. Side note here, why do we not have a nick name for Bachmann yet? #teamname defeated Slicers not Hookers (22 – 18). They were led by Wildcard and Washburn who both took 7 points. Wildcard’s HC is steadily going down as he continues to consistently shoots under his handicap. Meanwhile, Free Port Sandwich has moved into 4th place with their victory over Moore’s Misfits (22 – 18). They were led by Almeida, the ruler of the flat lands, who managed 6.5 points. Also, I noticed some of you are having some fun with the Shoutbox by impersonating each other by falsely posting comments as one another. Ha ha, very funny. Remember, those with the administrative access to the blog hold the power to put an end to those shenanigans! I know who you are….
The winners of the (A/B) low net were Matt Bedell and Jason Nill with a low net (31). Their handicaps better have adjusted after scoring 5 under! The winner of the (C/D) low net was Don Moore with a low net of (32). The same goes for Donnie Golf game! Congratulations to the winners!
We play the front of the Willows this week and then it is off to the dreaded back nine of the Willows. That’s a good opportunity to cash in on those “complimentary” golf cart rentals the club house offered after the night golf fiasco during week 2. If you didn’t cash in, it’s probably too late now. Thank you for your participation and we hope to see you on the golf course. As always, hit ‘em straight!
George Almeida, GCCGL Co-Commissioner
