2023 – Week 2
Good day GCCGL golfers! Week 2 is in the the books! The big news of the week was undoubtedly the highly anticipated match between Cletus and Syndrome. The match was everything you would have expected it to be. It was a battle every other hole to see who could play the worst. If anyone put together a couple good holes, they’d turn around and erase it with a 7 and 8 on the next 2. They ended up tied for gross, but only because Syndrome was getting a stroke, he took the low net and won the match (6-4).
I don’t know about all of you but I don’t think there was enough hype around this monumental event. This match should have been billed as the Battle of the Blue Hairs, you know, because they’re both old. Or how about Metamucil Melee? Again, because they’re old and probably need help with their daily “movements” if you catch my drift. No good? What about Jurassic Golf, The Gimp and the Blimp? Oh, I know, Cletus vs Diabeetus….. Come on, give me a break, these are hard to come up with!
Alright, now that I have your attention, we are only in week 2 of the 2023 GCCGL season but let’s talk about a growing problem. The commissioner’s office can confidently state that this is the worst start to a GCCGL season ever for attendance. Keep in mind that there was a time in the late 90’s that Cupcake would pick up hitchhikers and basically kidnap them to play in the league. He lured them into his Subaru hatchback by taking off his shirt and blasting The Village People on the radio. The stats speak for themselves. 7 no show / no subs in the first 2 weeks and only 85% attendance record. It will be very difficult to claw back to our usual high 90% by year’s end. And I can vouch for this pathetic start. I actually emailed EVERY SINGLE sub in a mass email to get a sub for next week. I received ONE response out of a possible 28 substitutes. That is a whopping .03% response rate. Yikes. My question to all you subs out there. Are you just going to sit there and let this happen?
Staying on the whole attendance thing, Courtesy Tap-Ins didn’t have a single one of their players show up. PW had a prior engagement and could not make it but I had a sub. As a matter of fact, I won’t be there next week as I will be celebrating my 32nd wedding anniversary with my lovely wife. And the week after, I’m on vacation relaxing on the beach, surf fishing, reading a good Grisham novel and hanging with the family. But I have a sub for each week. Etheridge also wasn’t there but he did get a sub. Our A-Player and D-Player were both no shows / no subs. It is going to be a LONG season.
Other than than that, not much to write about this week. Brady bought a Bad Birdie shirt which made Lip Gloss a little misty.
The big winners this week were Meat Balls who “minced” Courtesy Tap-Ins (27-13). They were led by Cap and super-sub Brady Gosney. Both of them took 8 points. Go Putt Yourself spanked Dude, Where’s My Par? (25-15). They were led by Ollie who took 7 points against a rookie. The low-net winners were Goldie (A/B) with a low net 34 and Brady (C/D) with a low net 35. Great rounds gentlemen. Congratulations! We continue match play this week. We hope to see you on the course and as always, hit ’em straight!
The Portuguese Warrior – GCCGL co-commissioner
