2023 – Week 1

It was an ugly day for PW.

By my count, we used an estimated 86% of Swiper’s shots compared to PW. That means PW contributed a grand total of 14% of shots used. We only used 1 approach shot and one chip that I can remember and only one putt (on the first hole) out of an approximate 22 golf shots (not counting lag putts). I didn’t count the lag putts mostly because I wasn’t keeping track but it would have most likely brought my number up a bit. Quite frankly, I don’t deserve it. As bad as this was, it doesn’t really tell the whole story because we did not use a single one of my drives off the tee. Not one. Ethridge carried me like new born baby freshly popped out of their momma’s womb. It was awful and as a result, we finished in last place at +3. As bad as I was, it wasn’t entirely my fault. We had to play with only 2 players. There is no way a 2-man team is winning anything in a Florida Scramble format. My team was doomed before the first cup of coffee Thursday morning. Our A-Player was AWOL. No text messages, no return phone calls, no nothing. Our D-Player sent an email practically minutes before tee time stating he couldn’t make it. That was helpful. But HEY, at least we were notified! It was a disastrous a start for Courtesy Tap-Ins.

Weather-wise, it was a beautiful day other than the hurricane-like winds. Attendance could have been better. We had half of the teams play at less than full strength. Not a good start, but it’s par for the course especially during the early part of the season. But please, in the future, try your best to get a sub when you can’t make it. And “trying your best” doesn’t mean offering one person, Mike “Big Donkey” Harris, $20 to sub for you. We have a lot of subs who signed up to “sub” so let’s give them a chance.

I’m addressing the elephant in the room (the GCCGL Mobile version of the website). This has been a thorn in my side for quite some time. There are valid technical reasons for the issues, none of which any of you yahoos would understand, so I’m not going to bother explaining it. All you need to know is that I spent the very early hours of Friday morning and pretty much most of the evening that same day, trying to fix it and at least get it to the point where the mobile site will hopefully work the rest of the season. I’m WAY past my GCCGL quota of hours for the season and we are only in week 1. The Magic 8-Ball is telling me it’s going to be a long and irritating season for old PW.

What else happened this week….. um, Crowe was disturbingly concerned about my socks. Oh and John “Syndrome” Rayburn was up to his “nick naming” ways again. This week’s target was Jack Tally. Jack is what we sophisticates call a Ginger. He’s a redhead, hence a “copper top”, thus the “Duracell” nickname. Unfortunately, Johnny boy was showing his age a bit because none of the pubescents in the league knew the reference. It’s actually quite clever, but as usual, Syndrome’s creative genius is lost on today’s generation. They had no idea about the Duracell marketing campaign from the late 70’s. Of course, I got the reference right away. The Duracell battery was the original copper top battery and became famous for their commercials back in the day.

The funny thing about this commercial isn’t the acting, although it’s comically bad, it’s how old the footage and production value looks. I mean damn, I was playing Little League baseball for God’s sake when this thing came out! But by the looks of this commercial, you’d think I tied my horse and buggy to the dugout and pranced out to center field in my wool uniform and straw hat! Syndrome, are we really that old?

I’m done. I’m tired and I’m pissed that half the league wasn’t even born when this stupid commercial went on air. Congratulations to Go Putt Yourself and Meat Balls for winning the Florida Scramble! The Closest-to-the-Pin winner was Goldie (A/B). No one from the C/D group hit the green. How many times have I said THAT on this blog?! We hope to see you on the course and as always, hit ’em straight!

The Portuguese Warrior – GCCGL co-commissioner