2021 – Week One
The word of the day is “hosel”, pronounced (ha- zel). I was golfing last weekend with Syndrome, Potter and The Assassin. The Assassin isn’t relevant to this story but if I don’t mention him, he’ll think I don’t like him and I’ll be bombarded with hate mail and all other sorts of untruths so…. At any rate, I noticed several times throughout the round, when Syndrome addressed his tee shot, Potter would blurt out “Hosel”. Syndrome’s ears would perk up much like a dog when given an order and he would proceed to take a step back from the ball and then smack a beautiful drive up the middle of the fairway. This was amazing to me. What kind of mind control, witch craftery kind of crap was going on here? This continued throughout the round and every time Potter would blurt out “hosel”, Syndrome’s butt cheeks would clench and without muttering a word, he would obey, take a step back, readdress his ball and swing. Boom…..another drive down the middle of the fairway. This is Hocus Pocus…..that’s what this is!
You can imagine where my mind went after a couple of hours of this. All the while this is going on, I’m thinking to myself, what has Potter done to my friend Syndrome? If he’s controlling JR this easily with a simple word like “hosel”, what is he making Syndrome do in the privacy of his home? I shivered at the thought of what might happen if he uttered the word “kumquat” or “nipple”.
Finally, half way through the round, I gathered up as much courage as I could (because I didn’t want to fall victim to Potter’s black magic) and confronted Potter about his total mind-control over Syndrome who, by this point, had been reduced down to nothing but Potter’s Stepford wife. I asked Potter, what are you doing to my friend! What are you saying to him?! That’s when Potter, Syndrome and The Assassin (see I made him part of the story after all), explained to me that Potter was simply reminding Syndrome that he was aligning the hosel of his golf club with the golf ball. This was a reminder to JR to step back a couple of inches and realign his ball with the clubhead. Whew!! Thanks goodness!
I’m not ashamed to admit here and now, I had no freaking idea what a hosel was and as far as I know, I never remember hearing that word before in my life! All I know is that my friend isn’t being forced to perform unspeakable acts at Potter’s command. Although, I’ll pay big bucks for a word that will make him mow my lawn.
Team Good If It Joe’s has submitted an official Team Name change after finishing dead last in the Florida scramble. The request is being evaluating by the commissioner’s office. Normally, this is strictly prohibited but after seeing the new name recommendation, I have to admit, it was pretty funny. Their B Player, Couzin’ Joe, was unable to make the Florida Scramble. Let’s be honest, we don’t know if they would have finished higher up in the scramble or not but, the new name Good If Joe Shows made me laugh. Team dissention after one week! Poor CJ misses one week and he’s already getting crap from his teammates.
We are still working through some technical difficulties regarding the GCCGL blog site. Please be patient while we work out the kinks. Thank you.
The winners of the Florida Scramble were the Rollin’ 60’s with a -3. Although super-sub, Scratch, was bombing drives and Boot Boy was sticking it on the green from 230+ yards on #16, it was the short game that clinched the victory for this team. Critical pitches and putts were scattered between all team members and that is why they prevailed. The winners of the STP on #15 were Goldie (A/B) and The Assassin (C/D). Congratulations to the winners! We begin the first match play of the season this week on the front of the Willows. We hope to see you on the course and as always, hit ’em straight!
PW – GCCGL Co-Commissioner
