2021 – Week 9
Let me start this week by wishing all the fathers in the league a very Happy Father’s Day, and from
someone who’s been very vocal over the years about my dis-like for the Kenton County Golf Resort, I will give credit where credit is due. I got to play golf with my dad today, and to make a long story short, we played the Willows with some of his buddies. We had the 8:00am tee time and teed off 20 minutes late, so as you might imagine, I was not pleased. However, as the day played out, it became clear as to why the round was taking so long.
Kenton County, in an effort to accommodate anyone wanting to play with their father, allowed groups to go out with as many as 6 golfers to a group. We saw a lot of 5-somes and several groups of 6. Many were young kids, boys and girls, that just wanted to spend time with their dad’s, doing what he likes to do… play golf. Two of the groups included the mother who was just there to drive the cart and take pictures. We met one group of 4… a young boy, his father, his grandfather and his great grandfather. The pace of play didn’t bother us at all once you saw what was happening. It was really cool. So, kudos to Kenton County on a job well done.
Having said that, NOW I have an issue with Kenton County I’m going to speak about. Kenton County needs to do something about the range. Dustin Allen got struck with a golf ball while on the 12th hole when some idiots weren’t smart enough to stop hitting their driver. We see the yellow golf balls on hole 12 all the time, so this was not some freak of nature. The fence separating the range from hole 12 is reachable by many, especially when the move tees forward week by week. Anyone using the range can see when golfers are at the dogleg and need to use a little common sense and stop hitting the driver when a group is there. But the accountability must be shared by the idiot on the range and Kenton County. This is not the first issue we’ve had. A couple of seasons ago, balls were coming over the fence and the foursome called the clubhouse, and someone had the sense to run out there and stop them, so Kenton County is well aware of the issue. Put up a taller fence. Put up a sign stating “no drivers allowed”… I’ve seen that at other courses before. Whatever it is Kenton County needs to do something before someone seriously gets injured. Below is the souvenir that Dustin got for daring to play the 12th hole last week.
TWIG Notes
This Thursday marks the half-way point of the season and “Jerry’s Kids” currently sit in first place.
They hold a 9-point lead over “Dustined to Fail” and a 15.5-point lead over the “Rolling 60’s”
The M&M Boyz continue to get it done. Both Mikes have are tied for the league lead with 5 wins apiece (along with Kreyling) and Morell holds a ½ point advantage over Ethridge for the overall points lead…41.5 to 41. Speaking of Mike Ethridge, finally played and beat an opponent who shot a net score under par. Congrats Mike!
Additionally, their captain Jim Allen, despite being a rookie, posts a respectable 4-3 record to go along with 39 points. What strikes me as strange, is that this team seem to be pulling away despite Pete Goldenberg not yet playing up to form. If Pete turns it on… turn out the lights, cause the party is over. Rich Parvesse and Serkan Freeman share the Money Lead with $42.66 each.
The Big Donkey got his 1 st win of the season, leaving Andy Crowe and Brian Roddy as the last two men without a victory. The Big Donkey also won the A/B Low Net, while the C/D Low Net was spit between Ethridge, Freeman and Parvesse.
Word on the Range
Welcome to a new segment called “Word on the Range” where I’ll be talking about things discussed on the range prior to the round. Word on the range was the Danny Roller had the option to visit Salt Lake City either this week or next week but chose to go this week. The determining factor? By going this week, he avoided playing the red-hot Mike Morrell… but will be back in plenty of time to play next week’s opponent… the luke-warm Joe Eiser.
Word on the range is in an effort to supplement his income, 3-time winner of the “Jeff Later Rock Star of the Week Award”, Andy Crowe is making his very own “Viagra”, and apparently, it’s really good too. Unfortunately, it has not yet been tested or approved by the FDA, so purchase at your own risk.
Word on the range is that Nick Duer hurt is wrist while…. Well there was of talk about Nick Duer and how he hurt his wrist. Let’s just say none of it was suitable for print in this family-friendly blog.
2 Truths and a Lie
I’m considering adding another new segment called “2 Truths and a Lie”. This is (obviously) based on the game of the same name. In this segment I would present 2 true facts and 1 lie about the what happened in the GCCGL that week. It’s up to you to determine the lie. Or, I’m thinking about a different way to approach this same game… but in this scenario I would drink 2 “Truths” (Rhinegeist Truths) and then just tell you a lie.
Let me know your thoughts on which you’d prefer. And now the update, you’ve all been waiting weeks for…
The Feud: Ben’s Story
As I had hoped for, Kreyling put Leininger in my foursome this week so that I would have the
opportunity to get Ben’s side of things, which in my opinion was the right thing to do… and as you can imagine, Ben’s side of the story was a bit different than John’s. As a quick reminder, (as published in the week 7 blog) here’s John’s side of the story. Week 2.
The first week of match play. The conditions were brutal. Cold and Windy. Leininger and Rayburn were in a closely contested match on the front side of the Willows. They were playing in the second to last group and darkness was closing in. They teed off on Number 9 with no issues. Due to slow play, darkness, the 6 th group pushing them and the USGA 3-minute rule… there was limited
time to search for golf balls. I don’t know if it was 1 lost ball or 2 (that part of the story is unclear) but Ben, on his way to an 11 for the hole was noticeably upset at the other members in the foursome for not helping him look for his lost ball(s).
“It was the second and fourth shots where things fell apart” said the Assasin. By the end of the 9 th hole, Benny was enraged!
According to George “He was upset at the foursome, I think, which was me, JR and Serkan. But I think he was more upset with JR because he was playing against him”. “He was pissed on the green and politely said something to the effect of I’m not helping you mf’ers look for balls anymore”. That was John’s story.
Now, I present to you Benny “the Jet’s” story.
“If I remember correctly, it was week 3 and we were playing the back side of the Pioneer. It was a
beautiful night. Warm and sunny… not a cloud in the sky. We were playing with Andy Crowe and Jeff
Capannari. I remember that distinctly because Andy kept talking about the Bengals draft the week
before. Anyway, we were in first group that night. We went off early and played at an extremely quick pace. I think we finished in about an hour and 45 minutes. Darkness was definitely not going to be an issue for us. It was hole 3, I think, were things started to go south. Andy and Jeff were talking about getting matching Tee Higgins and Ja’Marr Chase jerseys and I suggested I get a John Ross jersey to join them. Rayburn then chimes in and says “Why not get a Tyler Boyd jersey instead? Wouldn’t that make more sense, bro?” It really hurt my feelings.
Then, on hole 7, Jon hit an errant tee shot which I quickly hustled over to find (as I always help my
opponents search for their lost balls). I located Jon’s ball and picked it up to show him I’d found it. He screamed at me because he’d now incur a 2-stroke penalty because his ball had been moved. I tried
to tell him it was no big deal… that he could drop it right there with no penalty, but Jon was pissed and incoherently muttered something about always playing by the strictest of rules in this league. I was starting to not to like the man.
Finally, we came to the last hole. At that point, even though I’d been stellar all evening and was beating Jon by a score of 17-8, I hit a poor tee shot that he was able to locate for me. I then hit another shot left of the green and behind a tree. I used the old foot wedge to get a clear shot and knocked it up on the green about 40 feet from the hole. My first 2 putts were not great, but then I gave myself a testy 4 footer for a “4” on the hole. So then, Jon says “I think that might have been a 6, you may want to recount your strokes”. I couldn’t believe it. What a D-bag. I was furious.
Even though I don’t usually drink beer, I went in and purchased 9 pitchers for the entire league and tried to relax.
Later, after I cooled off, I tried to smooth things over by sending a bottle of Pappy Van Winkle to Mr. Jon Rayborn… but he says he never got it… so yeah, now I wanna take a swing at the man”.
After speaking with Ben, I reached out to Cap and Crowe for comment, but they had no idea what the hell I was talking about.
New Feud… Rayburn vs Koepka
Speaking of golf feuds, is there a new one brewing between 2 men already involved with separate golf feuds this year? I’m talking about Brooks Koepka and John Rayburn. Check out this from twitter and yes this is 100% real.
As always, Golf is Hard. If it were easy, it would be called “your mom”.
Big Donkey
