Year of the Cletus
Preface (05/10/15)
After a disastrous 2014 season, Cletus vowed to put together a comeback season so he proclaimed 2015, “The Year of the Cletus”. After the first three weeks of the season, it sure looked like Cletus’ proclamation was starting to come true. A tribute video curiously surfaced and well…….the rest is history.
It was a super quiet week in the GCCGL. No trash talking, no controversy, no Match of the Week and no Kreyling’s Korner! What’s up with that Lip Gloss? I guess in his defense, I stole his thunder when week two’s blog content was mostly about turtlenecks. LG had planned to write about the proper use of this under-worn and under-appreciated garment but I beat him to the punch! Sorry LG!
Seriously, there was nothing going on this week that I could exploit…uh, I mean blog about so I’m going to get right to the results for week 3. Daddy Day Care were the big winners this week after absolutely embarrassing Three Men and an Ollie (25 – 15). They were led by who else, old man Cletus, who schooled another senior tour member and took 8 points. DDC have now opened up an 11.25 point lead over The Big Bang Theory who lost to the Massholes (21 – 19). Almeida led the Massholes with 7 points. The final team match between Duer and Roller Again and The Offensive Line was a grudge match and finished in a (20 – 20) tie.
The Year of the Cletus continues! More on that topic later. Cletus shot the same or better gross score than everyone except his teammate Prince Albert! Before you ask, NO, his handicap still hasn’t gone down. I can’t explain it. I emplore you to contact the GCCGL Complaints department at 859.572.8994. This emergency hot line is available 24 x 7 and also provides, line holding services, dry cleaning delivery and pickup as well as lawn mowing services (shirtless mowing is extra).
I was hoping to gleam some information during my first ever round with Brian Roddy and Gregg Szylakowski which would have been used to conjure up meaningful and insightful nick names. Unfortunately I have squat. All I have is that Roddy is one of the most positive players I’ve played with in a long time. It’s a completely opposite experience than golfing with Cletus. As for Gregg, he’s a quiet guy with a calm demeanor on the golf course and I still have trouble spelling his surname.
Staying on Cletus for a minute, this has to be one of the better starts for a GCCGL member in a long time. He’s the current points AND money leader, he’s undefeated and his team is in first place. Yes, I know it’s only been three weeks, but technically Cletus is playing as a “D” player and posting scores equal to or better than many of the “A/B” players. All the while, his handicap stays inflated and he’s loving every minute of it. Therefore, I thought it was appropriate to post a little-known song video of an old classic tune titled, “The Year of the Cletus“. I promise you, it’s a real song. No modifications were made to the lyrics. Take a look below.
The low net winners this week were Prince Albert and Potter (A/B) with a low net of 35. Cletus (C/D) takes the low net again with a blazing (31). Congratulations to the winners! We stay on the back nine of the Willows this week. This week is match play but it is the GCCGL favorite Pot Luck event! Yes, it is a little early this year but that is because we had to squeeze in a couple of new events so this one had to move up. You will be emailed when to report to the league’s commissioner’s office to select your playing partner.
Please try to be on time this week. Through no fault of our own, we struggled to finish with enough daylight this past week. The clubhouse has been notified and has received the absolute full wrath of the Portuguese Warrior so I would expect them to NOT send out any more jean wearin’, radio blastin’ mullet-head numskulls ahead of us for the rest of the season. We hope to see you on the course and as always, hit ’em straight!
George Almeida – GCCGL Co-commissioner
