2024 – Pre-Season Picks
The team names are in! Get ready to be blown away by the best damn golf league in the history of golf leagues. The GCCGL will be forever ingrained into the very fiber of your being. It will be all you talk about for 20 weeks on Thursday afternoons and Friday mornings. It will become a major topic of conversation around dinner tables all over the Cincinnati area. You’ll tell your friends, family, co-workers, neighbors, kids, your kid’s friends and your pets about the GCCGL. Don’t believe me? Talk to me in 21 weeks.
And now, for the blog post you’ve all been anxiously waiting for. The 2024 GCCGL predictions. Last year, we had Artificial Intelligence predict the standings. You can read all about it HERE if you are interested. It was an epic failure with AI picking the eventual champions to finish 5th. So much for robots running the world. They can’t even predict the GCCGL champions.
What is the first rule of the GCCGL? You have to have a great team name in order to have a chance at the coveted GCCGL Championship. Just look at the last three championship teams:
2023 – Return of the Cletus – a clever and funny name which embodied the essence of that team’s existence. As a result, it produced the latest GCCGL champion.
2022 – Booze Rattlers – a strong, manly team name that once again, personified the attitude of that team. They all drank beer, lots of it, each week and what did it get them? A GCCGL Championship trophy.
2021 – Rollin’ 60’s – Ok, Ok, so it doesn’t always work. That was a terrible team name, but they still won.
So, without further ado. Here are the 2024 GCCGL predictions.
| (1st Place) Drawshank Redemption – Bedell, Muench, Bloomhuff, Allen Bedell, Muench, Bloomhuff and James Allen. I don’t know. This bunch doesn’t strike me as a golf team. It more resembles a hospital waiting list for a liver transplant. But somehow, it fits. It starts with the team name. No doubt, a great name. Then you have Cletus Bloomhuff coming off a championship season and of course the silver fox, Matt Bedell, steering the team with his 13 years of GCCGL experience. James Allen is rock solid in the D slot. But the key will be long-time sub, Jonathan Muench. How will he adjust to coming off the bench all these years and put in the starting lineup? You gotta like their chances though. |
| (2nd Place) Clubhouse Cowboys – Brady, Nill, Leininger, Tally What did I just say about team names? The Clubhouse Cowboys? That was the best you can do? I guess the Village People was already taken. However, as you saw in 2021, bad team names still have a chance. The one thing this team has going for it is youth. You know you’re young when the old man on the team is Jason “Cupcake” Nill. This team could easily surpass Drawshank Redemption and win this whole thing but their achilleas heal might be their team chemistry. I’m looking at those four individuals and let’s be honest, they couldn’t be more different if they were a Cowboy, Indian, Construction worker and a Cop. You see what I did there? |
| (3rd Place) Our D is Better Than Yours – Kreyling, Crowe, Cap, DeAngelo This team is already trying too hard with their team name. Of all the teams for the 2024 GCCGL season, this team was the hardest to figure out. They could be great, or they can really suck ass. Kurt “Lip Gloss” Kreyling has been rock solid the last two years. Yes, his game play has improved very nicely however, that’s not the reason for his success. All the hours of therapy he’s dedicated to improving his mental state to overcome the “league effect” has really made him relevant again. The big question is, “Can Crowe overcome moving up a flight from C to B?” That will be the key to this team’s success or demise. |
| (4th Place) Vanilla Gorillas – Wethington, Roddy, Almeida, Delgado The sleeper of the season. Newcomer and “scratch golfer” Steve Wethington, miraculously dropped to the 3rd pick in the first round! I was shocked that this newbie was still on the board at the 3rd pick! I didn’t hesitate. This could be the steal of the draft right here. Then as PW was thanking the golf gods for his brand-new A player, Brian “The Senator” Roddy, who has the lowest handicap of the B flight, was not being selected. The other C players were avoiding him like he had Long-Covid or something. Roddy dropped all the way to the 4th spot on the board in the 2nd round, I couldn’t believe my good fortune! What is going on? Again, no hesitation. Roddy is taken off the board with the 4th pick in the 3rd round. Some might say, picking a second newbie, Delgado, is a gamble, but I don’t think so. The downside is that this team has two newbies. Rookies have historically not fared well in the GCCGL. But if these guys just play their game, it could all be over but the cryin’…. |
| (5th Place) Trains, Cranes & Elevators – Goldie, Parvese, Welling, Winkler The original team name was Cranes, Trains & Elevators. Then, I was sent an updated team name of Trains, Cranes & Elevators. Yea, that’s MUCH better. I’m sure there’s a story behind it but I gotta tell you, it better be a hellava story because that’s a hellava terrible team name. The happiest person in the league after they heard about this team’s name was Cupcake. All of a sudden, Clubhouse Cowboys isn’t sounding too bad. There are a lot of questions with this squad. Can Welling repeat the season he had last year with that bloated handicap? Will Goldie move up to the front tees? Will Parvese finally wear a hat on his head while playing a round? And will Winkler’s stand-up comedy success get to his head? Time will tell. |
| (6th Place) Party of Fore – Nixon, Etheridge, Livermore, Srinivasan Thanks for playing. See ya next year. |
So, there you have it. Take it to the bank! If you are up for it and weather permitting, we still have one more practice round on April 11th! If you can make it to the course, please let me know. As of the time of this blog post, it is looking ok-ish. Looks like it will be warm and wet, just how PW likes it. Get your mind out of the gutter Cletus!
BIG NEWS! The GCCGL knows inflation has negatively affected everyone the last couple of years. Therefore, we are increasing the prize money for CTP, LD competitions and low net winners to $20 and overall team standings 1st place ($45), 2nd place ($30) and 3rd place ($15). The GCCGL is well-run and well-funded. It is time to return some of that back to our full-time members. So, if you want to go grab that $5 cup of coffee instead of slurping that rocket fuel your wife or significant other has been brewing for you in the morning, go right ahead. The GCCGL has your back!
Another reminder, if you are 55 years or older and plan on moving up a tee box, YOU MUST ANNOUNCE THIS DECISION AT THE BEGINNING OF THE SEASON (if you haven’t already) AND STICK WITH IT FOR THE ENTIRE SEASON. NO EXCEPTIONS. Finally, please pay your dues prior to April 18th. You can pay Co-Commissioner Cupcake via Venmo:
The schedule is set for the regular season. Good luck everyone. We hope to see you on the course and as always, hit ’em straight!
The Portuguese Warrior – GCCGL co-commissioner
