2020 – Week Fourteen

Hello GCCGL. I shot in the 70s (on 9) in 2018. Hello GCCGL. I had the highest handicap in the league for two years. Hello GCCGL. I scored a 10, 11 and 12 in the same night in 2019. Hello GCCGL. There are still courses in the US that I cannot play because of my handicap. Hello GCCGL. I’ve heard I’m not ready for you. Are you ready for me?

After living rent-free in the heads of the Portuguese Warrior and Lip Gloss all season (see: every blog post of 2020), I decided it was time to make my editorial debut. I’ll start by addressing the elephant of the 10^th hole: my handicap. As our commissioners have correctly pointed out, I’ve made some major efforts to get better. Lessons and joining a club have been a big help but a few other factors deserve credit:

1. Pride – When I set off on my golf journey in 2017, I just wanted to play without embarrassing myself, hit some nice shots at Top Golf, and have a good excuse to get out of the house once in a while. After two seasons as the highest cap in the league and receiving strokes from way too many self-proclaimed hacks, I started to reevaluate my golf identity. I don’t consider myself a proud person. Most people that know me will agree that I tend to roll with the punches, keep my cool and rarely take anything personally. But I can only hear the Portuguese Warrior complain so many times about giving me strokes. Something had to change after the 2019 season. I set my goals, took lessons and hit the range with my mind set on one thing: climbing up from the bottom of the GCCGL
2. Addiction – Around the same time that I decided to get better, I was bit by the golf bug. My life started revolving around golf and there was nothing I could do. If I wasn’t at the course, I was watching golf, reading about golf or posting on golf message boards. I couldn’t stop thinking about golf. Much to my wife’s dismay, our one-bedroom condo now has a putting mat, hitting mat, clubs and balls strewn about just so I can get my much-needed fix to hold me over until I could hit another tee shot OB or miss a three footer.
3. Corona Virus – Despite the many Q-Anon theories of Captain Obvious, this pandemic is a serious concern. Thousands have died, millions have been infected (shout out Patient Zero) and it has taken a serious toll on our economy. However… this may be the greatest time in history to be a golfer, even a bad one like myself. Aside from it being the perfect activity for social distancing, working from home and the cancellation of just about everything else makes golf even easier to prioritize. Public and private courses around the country are setting record highs for rounds played month after month. Lunchtime range sessions, late afternoon tee times and the occasional par 3 course before work have all become possible while working from home. And after a whole day of sharing the kitchen table as cubicle, my wife has even requested that I play golf so she can have some peace and quiet (don’t worry, I left the security cameras on).

It was a heck (George, can I swear on here?) of a week for the league compared to the many predictions outlined in the Kreyling Korner. Lip Gloss’s MOW could not have been more accurate, even if it was made purely out of spite.

“it feels as though the championship dreams of China Virus lie squarely on the shoulders of Mr. Mike Ethridge.  This is the perfect storm.  The perfect storm for a MOW Jinx.  Ethridge wins 7-4.”

The Politician kept his streak going from last week with an Eagle on 10 and kept his composure on 11 for a 2-0 start. Many thought he would hand Swiper his first loss until he duffed his tee shot into the water on 12 and didn’t win another hole for the rest of the night. Not only did Swiper come out on top, but China Virus won all four matches of the night for 27 points and Junker won low net. Let’s just hope Lip Gloss is keeping his sports predictions on the blog and staying off Draft Kings.

Team Commissioner Cupcake Exotics also had a big week, clawing their way into third place with four wins and 26 points. They are now only 7.5 points behind Quid Pro Crowe and 8 points ahead of Gout My Fairway 2.0. With four weeks left, there is still a lot of potential movement in the middle of the table.

Next week we have Battle Golf, arguably the best night of the season simply because the practice greens will be filled with league members calibrating their hybrids and fairway woods. Gamesmanship will be at an all time high and the first hole will become paramount for victory.

Swiper – Guest Blogger