2020 – A Futile and Stupid Gesture

That’s a great string of words and I wish I had thought of them first. But, in case you’re not aware, it’s a classic line from the movie Animal House. It’s also the perfect summation of the first week of pre-season golf. A temp of 55 sounds pretty appealing but add wind gusts to 40 knots and rain to the forecast, and then we’re back to the title.

Nonetheless, Serkan, Duer, Roller and I headed out to the course to get this season off. There weren’t many cars in the lot and all of us had pre-paid, but each went into the clubhouse to check in because there was no starter as I was told when I paid over the phone. The snack bar is closed off and all of the merch is covered in plastic. This place is definitely open for GOLF ONLY! It’s also an all new staff apparently. I did not recognize one face. We talked briefly with one guy who explained why we couldn’t use the putting green. He may have been the new GM.

The course is in decent shape. I’m hesitant to say great because of course everything is green. It’s been raining a ton lately. There’s a reason grass is always green in Ireland. Because it rains constantly. Upon closer inspection, the greens were average in terms of turf quality and seemed slow due to needing a haircut. I guess grass cutters are closed down like barbers. There will only be three tees on Pioneer: Red, Yellow and White. I assume the same for Willows but didn’t remember to look at the other side of the card. That’s right, with Fox Run gone, there is one card with Willows on front and Pioneer on back. Wait, maybe it was Pioneer on back and Willows on front. Either way, it’s one card.

We played Pioneer front which was a nice way to start the season. Although, as empty as the place was, we could have played whatever we wanted to. Roller and Duer were on fire, regularly threatening greens on their drives…on the holes with the hurricane at our back. Serkan and I were battling mightily for last place. As the hurricane intensified, I noticed the temperature had dropped to 46 when we left. Interestingly, that’s close to the range of scores. I’m not saying who got what, except, I think Duer had 39, Roller 42, me 46 and Serkan 52. As we were leaving, it started to rain. I guess the season was getting off after all.

Next week will be interesting if the weather is nicer and more people come out. You would have to be certifiably insane not to pre-pay given that they limit the clubhouse to 2 people at a time. In fact, I wouldn’t mind if they let us pre-pay for a whole month at this point. The putting green is closed, and I think the range may be as well. Oh, and remember, walking only! They actually have some new pull carts that look like the things old people use to carry groceries.

Lastly, the title of this blog post, A Futile and Stupid Gesture, is also the name of a movie about the life of Doug Kenney, a founder of National Lampoon and key writer behind Animal House and Caddyshack. I recommend it.

See ya next week. Hit ‘em straight!

Syndrome – GCCGL Guest Blogger