The Flo-Rida scramble is in the books, and the 2024 GCCGL season is off and running.  As I mentioned in my previous post, we had a lot of “regular” members depart this past season.  I was curious to see what scores this year would be, and if the Flo-Rida scramble is any indication, the low rounds won’t skip a beat. 

#additionbysubtraction

THE LIPSMACKER MATCH OF THE WEEK

I couldn’t think of a better way to start match play than with a battle of old guys!  You know how you can tell if a guy in our league is old?  Don’t look at his hair pattern, or the way he cracks and pops when he walks.  As Aretha Franklin sings…if you wanna know…it’s in his…TEES.  That’s right, to be an old guy, you have to play from the yellow tees.  Speaking of moving tees, the whining and begging George did in this year’s GCCGL Commissioners winter meetings to get Cupcake and I agree to dropping the age to 55 where you can play from the yellow tees was borderline pathetic.  Nothing is more uncomfortable than seeing a grown man cry…and damn George was close.

Now for the golf – it’s early in the season so it’s really hard to judge each player’s “form.”  What I can say is that George will be playing his second consecutive week, which is way more than I could say last year (just wait until his pool opens).  And Ollie – one thing we all know about Ollie is he plays more golf than most of us in the league.  Unless he is climbing Mount Kilimanjaro or some shit.  Historically, PW has the advantage over Ollie 11-8-1. 

GLOSSY PREDICTION – I’m taking Ollie in this one. Why?  Insider Information.  I have it on good authority (and by good authority I mean PW texted Cupcake and I) that George is dealing with back problems.  He started bitching about it on Tuesday.  That’s right, the excuses start flying two days before we actually play.  George, just for the record, no begging or crying will get us to let you move to the red tees.  Ollie wins 5.5-4.5.      

KREYLING KORNER

Put some respect on our Name!

I played a weekend round at Kenton County recently and I noticed something in the clubhouse I have never noticed previously.  Right next to the men’s bathroom is a plaque for the “Hedges League Champions” (picture included to the left).  A couple things here: 1.) the Hedges is the slowest league EVER (some of us remember being stuck behind them years ago…still makes me cringe).  And this is coming from a league that is historically pretty slow (sorry – it’s just the truth).  2.) Why do they get a plaque?  Great, they have been playing at Kenton County since 1982.  But we have been playing at Kenton County since 1995.  We are in the 29^th year of this league!  That’s nothing to freaking take for granted.  I think we need to make it the league mission to get a GCCGL plague in the clubhouse for the 30^th Season!

#who’scomingwithme

Slow Play

Speaking of slow play, since it’s early in the season, let’s do a little refresher on how to keep up pace of play for the 2024 season.  I know last week wasn’t our fault because the clubhouse decided to let two 2-somes out in front of our league.  However, I feel like it’s helpful to give out a couple tips on how to keep things moving.            

1. Play ready golf. I don’t care if you got a birdie on the last hole or a double bogey.  On the PGA tour, yes, the give each other honors on the tee. In the GCCGL if you are ready, hit the ball already.
2. Read your putt as soon as you get to the green. Stop marking your ball and beginning your read once it is your turn.  There are 3 other people in your group putting.  Read your putts in between their turns and while they are getting ready to putt.  Then once it’s your turn, you have your line, you can put your ball down, and go.
3. Stop looking for your ball forever. The rule states 3 minutes – so take 2.  If you can’t find it, drop and move on already.  Most of the time if you can’t find your ball you hit a terrible shot.  You deserve a penalty shot so take it and move on.
4. Tell your stories in the cart, or while you are walking. Look I want to hear your stories, most of the time they make me laugh.  But if it’s your turn to hit the ball – shut up, hit the ball – and then go back to your story.  Don’t finish your story and then hit the ball.  Other way around…hit your ball and then finish your story.
5. If there is an entire hole empty between your group and the group in front of you, you are playing to slow. Period, end of story.  If you see this happening – let your playing partners know you have to speed it up.

#suckfastersummer

Until next week – fairways and greens my friends.