2017 – Week 11

Good morning boys and LG. It seems like forever since your friendly neighborhood Portuguese commissioner has blogged but I’m back! First of all, let’s give it up for Syndrome who filled in admirably during my absence. I think he did a great job and I could tell he liked getting his thoughts out there. If you ask me, it seemed like it was therapeutic for him. Were there some “cringe worthy” moments? Of course there were, it’s Syndrome! All l I know is that I found myself laughing and isn’t that what it’s all about folks?

Consider the excerpt from last week’s Syndrome blog post.

Sub stands for sub-human.  Lower than whale dung.  If my daughter married a sub, I’d kill her with a dull putter.  By the way…can anyone sub for me July 13? 

You see what he did there? Syndrome successfully used a common technique referred to as the “Don Rickles Effect” to tear down the target of the joke and then turn around and ask the target for a favor. I’m making all this up, nonetheless, it was executed perfectly. That’s pure blogging gold right there.

We have officially passed the half way mark of the 2017 GCCGL season. Can you believe that? It goes quick. Let’s face it, the GCCGL championship is all but over. The Young Guns won their 8th in a row! That’s an incredible run. They have a 38 point lead over the 2nd place team with 9 weeks to go. Think about that for a moment. The Young Guns can go out and each one of them could get skunked 10-0 by the 2nd place team and they’d still only be 2 points behind 2nd place. It’s all over but the crying. So instead, the rest of the league is playing for 2nd and 3rd place. That’s all that’s left.

Birdies, Eagles and a Crowe are in the midst of a historically, horrific season. They haven’t had a team win of any kind in two months. They are 88.5 points out of first place and 47 points behind the next team (in 5th place). To give you some perspective of just how bad this team’s performance has been, last season’s team, Gambler’s Fallacy, who is officially the worst team EVER in GCCGL history, was 40.5 points behind 1st place at this time last season. BEC is 47 points behind the 5th place team! Gambler’s Fallacy finished 101.83 points behind first place last season. At the rate BEC is going, they could conceivable finish 100 point behind 5th place at the end of the season, never mind 1st place! I guess you could look at this another way. BEC is SO GOOD as being SO BAD. That’s something isn’t it?

PW has taken some heat from LG this week for not helping out during co-commissioner Cupcake’s absence. You know something, that really makes the hair on my upper back stand up straight. LG seems to forget the number of hours put into the GCCGL website upgrade during the off-season. Not to mention streamlining the data upload process so that it only takes co-commissioner Cupcake a couple of minutes to update the data to the website whereas it used to take at least 30 minutes, leaving him more time to parade around his neighborhood shirtless. You’re welcome to the housewives of Milford, OH. By the way CupCake, put a shirt on when you mow the lawn for Christ’s sake Cupcake! Anyway, we now have so much data and statistics just a few clicks away at your fingertips due to the sweat and sacrifice of PW and do you think Lip Gloss cares? No! He’d rather complain about spending an extra 5 minutes working on the results spreadsheet and color-coordinating his Thursday night golf outfit, than thanking PW for all his hard work during the offseason. Yea, that’s right, I called it an “outfit”. He’s too busy spending $30 dollars to have some young beautician cut his hair once a week. Um, newsflash LG….YOU’RE BALD! OK PW…..relax….breath. SERENITY NOW……SERENTITY NOW……. Alright, I got that off my chest. I’m OK now.

 

 

Profile Spotlight
You know it’s coming. It seems only fitting that this week’s player profile is none other than co-commissioner Lip Gloss. Now, folks might think that LG and I have this suppressed animosity between us. But that couldn’t be farther from the truth. As a matter of fact, I applaud LG for his openness and embracing his true sense of self. He’s is truly a hero in my mind and as a matter of fact, each year on his birthday, I personally celebrate the one they call Lip Gloss with a bowl of United Dairy Rainbow Sherbet.

History Lesson
Since it was the Pink Ball event this week, I thought it would be appropriate to highlight last season’s Pink Ball Event as this week’s history lesson. Last season, the Portuguese Warrior went on the disabled list following hernia surgery. He returned on the week of the Pink Ball event. It didn’t go well for him. You can read all about it right HERE if you wish.

As everyone knows, Pink Ball is a D Player’s worst nightmare. However, it continues to be one of the more fun events in the GCCGL and this season was no exception. Of course, the winners were Young Guns with a score of 73. Not bad at all. The scoring summary went as like this:

YG – 73 – 20 points
STC – 75 – 17 points
DD – 79 – 12.5 points
ROVER – 79 – 12.5 points
JETS – 82 – 8 points
BEC – 83 – 5 points

The CTP winners were Meat (A/B) and Miller (C/D). Congratulations to the winners! We continue match on the Pioneer back this week. We hope to see you on the course and as always, hit ‘em straight!

George Almeida – GCCGL – Co-Commissioner

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